Saturday, March 25, 2017

The weeks that were....ELEVEN & TWELVE

I can't even remember why I didn't blog last week. Digging in my memory, perhaps it was a bad headache on Sunday. I've had a couple this week.

But on the bright side, I have decided it's time to  be happy again.

Work is settling down after my boss and I started to implement the  changes we discussed. I have also kicked off a "make the whole team happy" discussion with the managers across our department. The negativity and miserableness just has to go!

All in all, some really positive things are happening.

I started playing Futsal with a group of mums from school. I had never played soccer before, or even run for that matter. Our first game was last week. We played what seemed to be a semi-professional team. As we were talking about what the hell the rules actually were in this game, in walked a group of younger women in matching shirts and official indoor soccer boots - I was sure they were representing some kind of Australian team. We didn't win our first game, but we had a lot of fun in the process of conceding 18 goals.

My little lady has been hard work lately and the straw broke the camels back this week when the meltdowns and anxieties hit a high, so we are heading back to her counselor which will be of benefit to everyone. It really is so very tough to see her trying to deal with her anxieties as I know exactly how she is feeling - it breaks me heart.

Last weekend I attended a Hens Party for the every lovely soon-to-be Mrs C. It was great to dress up, get up and go out. We went to the Tea Cosy in The Rocks for High Tea and then ventured to The Observer for drinks - no Strawberry Daiquiris though. Seriously! How hard is it to get a cocktail in this city!

My list of ten 

Move - Still moving. I even ran!

Meditate - Still meditating. Taking lots of deep breaths.

Kind - Still reading - I have finished The Girl in the Spider's Web. Loved it. Now I am onto The Happiness Project....really trying to inject some serious positivity and happiness in my life and the life of others.

Connect - Connected with some lovely women at the High Tea for Mrs C.

Food - Still loving food. This week I have been craving chips & gravy...I have however not indulged.

Flow - Getting back into my flow at lot more these past two weeks and thank goodness!

Blog - No tick and then tick.

Budget - Same, same really.

Fun - Futsal, definitely fun. And deciding to be happy again, definitely fun.

How have you been?
What are your tips for happy?


Sunday, March 12, 2017

The week that was....TEN

There was only one place to go after last week and that was UP!

Literally spent so many hours this week talking to my boss about how we could work together to make my life easier. I am very fortunate he is so supportive. We have already started to put some new work processes in place that will really help take the stress off.

Tuesday saw me heading to the new ICC at Darling Harbour to the Simon Sinek and Peter Docker's Start with Why Leadership Forum. Totally blown away. Simon Sinek is an amazing speaker, so engaging and motivating. You really buy what he is selling. It was definitely a very inspiring day.

I spent time with two of my favourite people this week; my BFF Mrs M and my brother B.

Mrs M and I headed to Camperdown Commons for dinner on Wednesday night - such a great place, lovely atmosphere, great food, awesome company. Spending time together is always the deep breath I need.

Brother B and I went to the Treehouse for lunch on Friday. It has been so long since it was just the two of us hanging out, shooting the breeze. It was so lovely to catch up with him and to hear about his life.

Hubby was away for the weekend at a Buck's weekend. They have definitely tamed since we got married - an exceptionally good thing. The kids and I have been making slime (yep, more slime), going out for coffee & cake, watching Souths play and having movie nights.

My list of ten 

Move - Moved a lot more this week, which is always a good thing.

Meditate - Meditating more too.
Kind - Still loving the time I am spending reading. The Girl in the Spider's Web is so captivating I find it hard to put down to actually sleep. 

Connect - Connecting with my favourite people as I mentioned.

Food - I ate a bit this week but still had great wholesome foods - seriously check out Camperdown Commons if you can, it is great.

Flow - My flow is definitely a lot less clogged this week, which makes for a happier Sam and also teng

Blog - Tick.

Budget - Same, same really.

Fun - Definitely had fun this week with my favourite peeps and hanging out with my littlest monkeys.

How has your week been?


Sunday, March 5, 2017

The week that was...NINE

This week has been one of the hardest I've had for a while. A long while.

I slipped into a dark depression. Got totally overwhelmed. Realised I just wasn't coping.

Perhaps a good thing - the realising I wasn't coping part, not the depression part. Depression is never a good thing. But it finally hit me this week, I just can't do it all and I am not coping.

I just didn't want to admit to anyone, or even myself, that I just wasn't coping with my workload and parenting and everything else that comes along with living life. Something had to give before I had a full blown nervous breakdown.

Floods of tears were shed. Every ounce of energy and determination was used to even get out of bed. Cue an emergency appointment with my psychiatrist (have I mentioned how much I love her) and I am rebooting (her words).

We talked about all the things I could change in my life that would see me coping - I made a list, oh how I love a list. Currently the list is split into two; home and work. I see this being very organic and it will change as I work out what actually works and throw aside what doesn't.

I spoke at length about it to hubby, my family and my boss - all extremely understanding and supportive. I really am fortunate to be surrounded by such amazing people.

So, now is the time to reboot.

My list of ten 

Move - Rain and depression = very little steps this week. 

Meditate - Attempted unsuccessfully.
Kind - How I love to read....finished The Husband's Secret by Liane Moriaty, it was excellent!

Connect - Had lunch to celebrate the upcoming nuptials of one of the ladies at work.

Food - I am still loving fig, bocconcini, proscuitto and green leaves with a little balsamic vinegar on top. I also snuck in a pork belly for lunch :)

Flow - My flow was totally clogged this week.

Blog - Tick.

Budget - Still plodding along...Dr's bills were not part of the budget though...eek.

Fun - I made Slime with my little lady and helped her create a YouTube channel to show people how to make slime. I admit, that was fun.

How are you coping?
Got any tips for me?

Sunday, February 26, 2017

The week that was....EIGHT

Time. It really does get fly as you get older. I'm not too sure if it is my friend or my foe.

When I was younger my dad used to tell me not to wish the time away as it just got quicker and quicker and eventually I would want it to slow down. I thought he was crazy. Turns out he wasn't.

It is the eighth week of 2017 already. February is coming to end, therefore so is Summer. Autumn is quite literally around the corner again.

 Didn't Summer just start? I was so sure it had.

I seem to be getting to the state where time is going by so quickly my days are blending and I can't recall what actually happened this week, or was it last week, or perhaps it is on my To Do for next week?

Work this week seems to have calmed though....and that is a big THANK F**K. I mean we are far from cruising, but the stress levels have come down a smidgen. And we are working together to try to set things right again.

Wednesday are little misses piano lessons, and yeah OK I am totally bias because she is my kid, but she is gooood. I love to listen to her playing and see her little face light up. And it seems our little man is keen to start learning too. He is also talking about wanting to play the guitar, which at this stage would be bigger than him.

My list of ten 

Move - My steps have increased, though still not hitting the ever elusive 10k steps a day - nowhere near actually. Still really need to get my tail in gear. 

Meditate - Tick.

Kind - In an effort to get reading, because I love reading, I have two books on the go - The Husband's Secret by Liane Moriaty and The Girl in the Spider's Web by David Lagercrantz. Also, saw my Chiropractor again on Friday. He is happy with my progress. If only I could kick these headaches and back and neck pains I would be happy too.

Connect - Had lunch with some ladies from work this week, such kind, funny, witty women. It helped a lot in lowering the stress levels at work.

Food - Salads have been my go-to this week for lunch. At the moment I am loving fig, bocconcini, proscuitto and green leaves with a little balsamic vinegar on top.

Flow - While my stress is high, I do think that I am yelling a lot less, flowing a lot more.

Blog - I might even blog a few times this week!

Budget - So far so good, except when the bank hit us with a fee to change from Interest only back to P&I on the mortgage...seriously! COME ON! Damn banks.

Fun - On Saturday I took Little Miss on her first sushi train experience. It had been ages since I had been. She loved it and so did I. I really love our little Mumma, Daughter dates, where it is just her and I and we can talk about anything and not be interrupted by other distractions.

How was your week?
What are your thoughts on time?


Saturday, February 25, 2017

My Doctor Strange infatuation

Benedict Cumberbatch has never done anything for me. In fact, I don't think I have seen him in any other movies....let me google him, be right back.

Yep I have...Star Trek: Into the Darkness. Obviously his character didn't jump out and grab me in the feels like Doctor Strange has done.

Admittedly Benedict Cumberbatch probably still does nothing for me. It is not like we went on a hot date or anything. I have no idea what he is like IRL (In Real Life for people of my age, cause the first time someone said this to me I had NFI). Even though th
ere was that one time I saw him on the couch with Graham Norton and he seemed perfectly likable.


Anyhoo, I totally digress.

I have just watched Doctor Strange, of the Marvel variety. And I guess I should preface this by saying that I love all things Marvel. Especially the Extra Terrestrial versions, like Guardians of the Galaxy.

So, when Doctor Strange started with scenes reminiscent of Inception with some trans-dimensional jumping thrown in I was hooked. (and on a side note, Tilda Swinton rocks this movie so hard, she is seriously amazing).

We are then introduced to the arrogant, self-consumed, arse-hat Doctor Stephen Strange (played by
Benedict Cumberbatch - surprise, surprise), who has a total fear of failure. On the other hand he has a quirky sense of humor and soft gentle eyes (and aren't they the windows to the soul). Seriously, what more could you ask for in a superhero?

Fast forward a few scenes and he is involved in a car accident and injuries his hands beyond repair. We also learn he had a brief tryst with a lovely woman, Christine (played by Rachel McAdams), who is clearly way too lovely for him.

His quest to gain the use of his hands leads him to the Ancient One (Tilda Swinton) and here is where all the fun begins as he is drawn into the world of the mystic arts - and of course meets a bad guy who is trying to help the "dark universe" take over the world.

The special effects in this movie are amazing! As I mentioned Tilda Swinton is amazing! And Benedict Cumberbatch plays Doctor Strange so wonderfully with his one-liners and raised eyebrows that you will surely be infatuated as well. Special mention must go to the Cloak of Levitation - who goes pretty close to stealing the whole god damn show.

Have you seen it?
What movie characters grab you in the feels?

Sunday, February 19, 2017

The week that was...SIX and SEVEN

How did I miss a whole week?

I whizzed through and barely touched the sides! I would love to ask the question - "Where has the time gone?" but I feel I already know the answer.

It has been sucked into the vortex that is my highly stressful, soul sucking job - at least that is what it is like at the moment. It hasn't always been like that and here is hoping (with all my might) that it doesn't stay like that! I mean it can't, can it?

I was lulled into a false sense of security a couple of weeks back....there was a rainbow overhead, which meant less stress on me. And... then the clouds rolled in again, shut out the light, the rainbow faded to nothing and here we are again.

At the moment it is consuming me. And yes, yes I know that is my own decision to let it consume me. I could just leave it all at the door when I leave - trust me I have tried. But my damn conscience and high work ethic just won't let me do it.

So the past two weeks have seen me utter depleted by work and feeling like the worst wife, mother, friend that there is in whole wide world....hence the dark clouds of depression have rolled in and sheer exhaustion ensued.

But I can't say it has been all doom and gloom....I did take a day off to go to our little misses first swimming lesson and while she didn't swim in ANY races, it was a delight to be sitting with her in the sun for a day.

The weekly neighbour dinners now involve another family in the street, which is awesome, so Monday nights are always great - and I only have to cook every third Monday now :)

My list of ten

My steps have been minimal - to say the least. And as for Michelle Bridges, well I haven't even seen her and I am two weeks in! OMG! Really need to get my tail in gear. 

Always loving my meditation and mindfulness. 

I am still seeing my Chiropractor on a weekly basis - a good thing too, because with all the stress has come an extremely sore and seized up neck.

How are you going?
Being kind to yourself?


Sunday, February 5, 2017

The week that was...FIVE

What a week in Castle Stone!

Our little lady headed back to school this week as a Year 3 kid with the biggest smile on her face. This is a massive breakthrough for our little lady as the start of every other school year has been met with massive trepidation and anxiety. To say it was a super proud mumma would be an understatement.

She also headed back to her mini swimming squad sessions - I was freaking out and so was our little lady. Her first exposure to mini squads was a total disaster and led to screaming sessions and her little arms wrapped so tightly around me with utter refusal to get in the pool at all.

Queue a teacher and pool change  last term and we were making progress - she was actually in the pool even though she wasn't participating in the lesson.

Fast forward to this week and she was met with a new teacher (the teacher that made the progress last term isn't teaching anymore) and instant anxiety, she clung to me and said "I don't want to do it".

The teacher (who I am now totally in love with) said to her, "let's just give it 5 minutes, if you are stressed after that you can get out". She climbed in to the water and that was that....she swam the whole lesson and was amazing. She emerged from the water smiling and so proud of herself. Another totally proud mumma moment, this time I could even possibly have a tear.

This week also saw us at a new music school (the previous one has closed down) and therefore a new environment and new teacher, our little lady was a bit anxious about this as new places, situations and people are what make her most anxious. However, her teacher was beyond lovely and our little man and I got to sit in on her first lesson and she is actually really good. The teacher was very impressed as was I. And yet another proud mumma moment.

Our little man also headed back to swimming lessons. My parentals take him on a Friday. Reports were not good - he didn't want to get in the water. Once in the water he did not want to participate and was not giving the teacher anything at all. Apparently he wouldn't even look at her. Queue my anxiety and that of my parentals and discussions on how we can get him to engage in his swimming lessons.

After all that I am totally exhausted! And still trying to get my head around being back in to the routine of drop-offs, pick-ups, after school activities, dinners, lunches etc etc.

My list of ten

My steps were a bit up on last week but nothing to scream from the rooftops about. Michelle Bridges 12wbt kicks off next week for me - so I will definitely be moving! My goal is to increase my fitness enough to play summer soccer with a friend. 

Still loving my meditation and mindfulness. 

I headed back to my naturopath this week after five months. She is such a lovely, caring soul. I am back on Vitamin B's, Probiotics and a tonic in an attempt for more energy and better gut health. 

I definitely feel like I am going with the flow a lot more - the anger levels seem to be a lot lower than recent times. 

How was your week?
Got kids back at school? How do you cope with the routine?