Devastated.....pretty much sums up my emotional state in the fallout of the latest Lance Armstrong headlines.
For those living under a rock, Lance Armstrong is an American former professional road racing cyclist and is the founder and chairman of the Lance Armstrong Foundation "Livestrong" for cancer support. He also survived testicular cancer (which became lung and brain cancer) in the mid 1990's. His cancer treatments included brain and testicular surgery and extensive chemotherapy.
Most notably was the fact that he won 7 consecutive Tour De France cycling races 1999-2005 after returning to cycling following his cancer treatment.
I have followed Lance Armstrong since the mid 1990's, I purchased his two books; It's Not About the Bike and Every Second Counts, which I have read countless times and continually admired his courage. I cheered him on during all 7 Tour De France wins. I have been a believer. A believer that cancer can be overcome and the unimaginable achieved.
When allegations first surfaced about Lance Armstrong and doping, I didn't believe and really didn't want to hear it. He was a hero, he had survived cancer and achieved the unimaginable - hadn't he?
The latest allegations however have been damning with 26 witnesses, 11 of these previous team mates, all giving evidence against him that he not only doped but provided them with the means to dope as well. And USADA believe they have strong evidence against him, amounting to more than 1000 pages.
Hubby has been emailing me links to news articles with all the sordid details and every news station has been headlining it all week. Commentary from fans seems to be "I don't care if he did it or not" - really? Weren't these fans believers in his natural abilities? Weren't they impressed by the thought of someone overcoming cancer and achieving 7 Tour De France titles?
Up until this stage he has not contested the allegations in court, and who knows if he ever will. Recent newspaper reports state he "might take a lie detector test if the 26 witnesses do the same". His lawyer is saying that the 26 witnesses have only come forward because they were offered deals, suspended for months instead of years for doping, so how can they be trusted.
I have to admit to continually wearing my rose coloured glasses about the whole thing (which I tend to do with a lot of things) and hoping that it will go away or new evidence will come out that the whole thing has been a mistake....unlikely I know.
Have I been wearing my rose coloured glasses for long enough when it comes to Lance Armstrong?
Image from AFP.